You ever want to see a musical starring the martian girl from SANTA CLAUS VS. THE MARTIANS, Boone from NIGHTBREED, Pluto from THE HILLS HAVE EYES, Jermaine Jackson and Optimus Prime? Then VOYAGE OF THE ROCK ALIENS is the film for you. I honestly wish I saw this sooner because like the weird worlds of BETTER OFF DEAD and ONE CRAZY SUMMER, I would have been obsessed with this.
It starts off with the title WHEN THE RAIN BEGINS TO FALL, which I thought was an alternate title, but is actually a music video for one of the songs in the film, featuring Pia Zadora and Jermaine Jackson. This has nothing to do with the actual movie, but is thrown in under the context of Robot 1539 (voice of Peter Cullen) looking for a planet that has rock and roll, because the aliens are obsessed with it. He determines that no, that song is not rock and roll, and sets a course for Earth.
Robot 1539 takes the crew of hibernation, which is a six-pack in the fridge that he runs through a machine to take them from doll-sized to full-sized. Their names are basically chunks of the alphabet ie ABCD, STUVWXYZ, etc, which is weird and got a chuckle out of me. They turn a spaceship into a phone booth and take it down to the town of Speelburgh, Georgia to investigate and find some rock and roll.
Speelburgh is a backwards sort of town. Their local body of water, Lake Eerie, is toxic from acid rain and will melt you if you go into it. The kids still go down to party at the beach, regardless, despite the tentacle that lives there in the water. What does it belong to? We never know. It’s also a great place to sing and dance, as Dee Dee (Pia Zadora) breaks out in a number to tell her friend Diane (Alison LaPlaca) about how she wants to sing with her boyfriend’s band.
Who is her boyfriend? Why it is none other than Frankie (Craig Sheffer), who plays with The Pack (real-life band Jimmy and the Mustangs), who have a rockabilly sound but that’s ok because all of the pack dress like greasers anyway. The only problem is that Frankie prefers to sing alone.
Enter the aliens, who come to the local malt shop to experience the culture. While there, ABCD (Tom Nolan) sees Dee Dee and explodes with desire, literally. Once he gets back together, he decides to pursue her, which Frankie is none to pleased about. Will ABCD and Dee Dee get together? What is Frankie going to do about it? Is there going to be more singing? The answer to that last question is a resounding YES. The others you will have to watch and see for yourself.
The film never stops moving, and just when you think it might slow down, there’s another song popping up to get it moving again. Everyone is game for what is going down, but I feel like the MVP is LaPlaca, who shines in every scene she is in and is probably the most expressive out of the bunch. Her scenes with Michael Berryman later on in the movie are easily one of the highlights for me. I might be biased though because I had a giant crush on her back in the day when I watched the John Laroquette Show. And for two bands, Jimmy and the Mustangs and RHEMA (who play the rest of the aliens) aren’t too shabby in their roles.
Not every song is a banger, but there’s aren’t really any that make you want to hit the fast-forward button either. “When the Rain Begins to Fall” and “Nature of the Beast” are two of the standouts for me. I have a soft part for the rockabilly foot-tapper that is “Justine” as well.
It’s weird, yet wonderful and thoroughly engrossing. Does it make a lick of sense? No, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t a fun watch. Check it out.
